Everything changes.
Spring is a time of change and we often feel the need to do ‘spring cleaning’.
But life is a series of changes. Always evolving. And it’s how we deal with these changes, how we look at them, that often determines the effect they have on us. Maybe if we could see change as opportunities or new chapters in our lives, instead of becoming defensive, unwilling or putting up a struggle, we would be able to open our eyes and our hearts, thus allowing the natural process of change to be less terrifying.
It is our perspective that many times is what really needs to change.
Notice I used the word ‘terrifying‘ instead of ‘fearful’. Because I don’t think it’s always possible to be ‘fearless’, and many times it is fear that motivates or pushes us to try something different. And different doesn’t necessarily equate to‘bad’, for outside our comfort zone is often the place we surprise ourselves with new potential.
My mother always looked at change with an open mind. I have to assume that her early childhood years in South Carolina, which were filled with abuse, set her up to yearn for change because anything different at that time in her life had to be better than what she had.
Her observations of nature (which she always paid close attention to. Eartha was her given name remember) had taught her to understand the necessity for all things to evolve; from the seasons to animals, to seeds, to human beings; ALL must experience change in order to grow.
Those are the lessons she would relay to me. From when I was an infant, throughout my life, she would talk to me and show me her ability to keep an open mind and an open heart; her willingness (sometimes by self-prodding) to take a new route, walk through a door that may be opening, or acquire a new skill. Not without fear, but with the faith and the knowledge that every experience is an opportunity.
“The river is constantly turning and you never know where it’s going to go or where you’ll end up. Following the bend in the river and staying on your own path means that you are on the right track. Don’t let anyone deter you from that.” ~Eartha Kitt
What and how we think is what we become. If you think you ‘can’ or you ‘can’t’, that is often the outcome. My mother loved to say that there was “no such word as ‘can’t‘, because ‘can’t’ is an easy place to get stuck. It is the quicksand of words and it will suck you in to its reality.”
She truly understood that EVERY day is a blessing and so we should approach it with gratitude. Even those days when it’s hard to find a silver lining. “Every day may not be good, but there is something good in every day.” I can’t credit her with those words, but I can give her credit for living her life that way.
The ultimate change is death. Since my mother’s passing, there have been many times when it has been easy to fall into that finality and focus on my loss. It can be difficult to see it differently because it is filled with so much sadness. But, as I have shared my mother’s life, her beauty, wisdom and love, with so many people these past nine years, my perspective and gratitude for the time we had together as mother and daughter, grows and blossoms with every day.
I was, and continue to be, incredibly blessed. And blessings are meant to be shared.
We all have some sort of legacy we leave. Whether we’re world famous or known to just our families, we all have something to share. And as we share, ideally with love and compassion, we hopefully can learn to appreciate the impact EVERY being makes on someone or something else. We are each a pebble in the pond of life, affecting change, no matter how small.
Be kind. Be grateful. Smile. Make that a part of your legacy.
Remember ~ Treasure ~ Love… Kitt
2 Response Comments
These are such wise words….thank you for sharing them with us, and reminding us that we have potential to make happier lives not only for ourselves but for those around us too! 🙂
True words from you and your Mum…sometimes I am resistant to change and the change could be for the better.